Personal server has been acting crappy for the last few days. This morning it locked up when I opened pine -- a perfectly reasonable thing to lock up on, don't you agree? -- and when the hosting provider went to reboot it they found the motherboard/processor was fried. Install new motherboard and processor, turn the unit back on and away we go. Should be set, right? Wrong. It locked up again at around 5:30 tonight. This time it was the hard drive that failed. Again. Which I believe means I have won some sort of trifecta of technological suck. It's like an inverse lottery -- hit all the numbers and you lose. So there's a freshly installed operating system and none of the data could be saved. Didn't I do this already, back in July?

I believe that this is a sign that I am not cut out for this "job" of running a personal hosting service any longer. Add in that I'm frustrated and tired of doing this "oh SHIT explosion quick put all the pieces back together!" dance on a steadily more frequent basis (before July the last big melt-down was in November of 2005. This is getting harder as time goes on and my life places other demands on me, such as my job, my relationship, my house, etc. I am tired of putting my hard-earned cash into this server and having all these problems with no hope of recouping any of the expenses I incur on a monthly or per-incident basis. Most of all I'm tired of the responsibility: For the last five years or more I have been hosting other people's websites, e-mail and games -- which makes me responsible for maintaining this ongoing nightmare.

I give up. I can't do this anymore, I just don't have anything left in me.

I'll send whatever data I can recover to everyone who had websites hosted on there. In the mean time any address ending in "@black-panther.us" is boned and unreachable. Same goes for any other domain I hosted.

it all fell apart

Tags: bpen, gruntle, hate, tech
Current Location: home
Current Mood: frustrated
Current Music: Cheap Trick - Surrender