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I'm done for a while. - Paint It Black
Living the American dream one heartbreaking piece at a time
I'm done for a while.
I've said before that no good deed goes unpunished because I'm like the walking poster child for this slogan. I'll probably continue saying that until the day I die. Hey, it's not often we find a universal truth and can demonstrate it on demand.

I told a friend of mine tonight that I get a daily dosage of bullshit from my job and life that more than adequately meets my Recommended Daily Allowance for tolerating the crap that goes on. I do not turn to my hobbies and the things that I do for "fun" just so I can get another faceful straight from somebody's leaky asshole[1]. Given what my job has been like and the other things that are going down in my life[2], my free time should be spent doing things that I find fun and enjoyable. What has transpired lately is neither "fun" nor "enjoyable." It's been hellacious and unpleasant. I've had my fill for a while and now I'm quite fed up so I'm going to stop for a bit. To that end: I'm gonna take a month or two break from the various MU* I deal with to go focus on other things that don't push my blood pressure into the high 100s. Once I've had a chance to reset I'll come back and pick up where I left off.

The irony of all this is? It comes hot on the heels of an entry from hakeber wherein she points and laughs at people that are foolish enough to put themselves through torture. There's wisdom in her words, gang.

Do you know how long it's been since I've turned off all the lights and sat in a tub full of hot water while Neil Young played in the background? Neither do I, because I stopped counting after five years. I'm going to start with that tonight. Tomorrow I'm going to read a book while some music plays on the stereo. Unlike anything I've read in the last three years, this will be a book that doesn't have the phrases "value-added," "RFP," "Layer 3," "MPLS" or "routing metric" in it[3]. I don't think I've actually read something for enjoyment in the last 16 months.

This concept of enjoying oneself is crazy, I know -- but I plan to give it a shot anyway.

I'll be on IM, so I'm still quite reachable without being so near the things that make my blood boil.

What does it take to get a drink in this place?

[1] This defeats the idea of a hobby and does not meet my definition of "fun." YMMV.
[2] A lot of my friends have had extraordinarily shitty runs of luck lately, as well. I am by no means saying I have it worse than them.
[3] Suggestions are welcome. I like Stephen King and eisenkreis has had some success in turning me on to Clive Barker.

Tags: , , ,
Current Mood: apathetic apathetic
Current Music: The Azoic - Conflict (Imperative Reaction

11 thoughts or Leave a thought
silvertailwolf From: silvertailwolf Date: October 18th, 2005 12:32 am (UTC) (Link)
Speaking of Stephen King, get ahold of his Dark Tower series if you haven't already. Awesome stuff.
shaddragon From: shaddragon Date: October 18th, 2005 01:32 am (UTC) (Link)
He turned me on to the Dark Tower series. ;)
neuracnu From: neuracnu Date: October 18th, 2005 12:40 am (UTC) (Link)
The IT industry is on a high note right now. This is my asshole business face talking, but you shouldn't feel the need to put up with so much as an ounce of bullshit right now. There are companies who are aching for talented people and I never let a day go by without reminding my managers of it.

Update your resume and send it out. When you start getting responses and turning them down, then you've got the power to say "no" (not nice "no" but "fuck you, no").

That's the #1 lesson I've learned at Reuters.
enveri From: enveri Date: October 18th, 2005 07:33 pm (UTC) (Link)
We've already prodded him about some positions opening up at Abbott. :)
From: hysd Date: October 18th, 2005 02:46 am (UTC) (Link)
Boo. Fer. :( Hope things get better. My break did wonders, so hope one helps you feel better!
ottr From: ottr Date: October 18th, 2005 08:36 am (UTC) (Link)
I know you're not want for hobbies, but you could still work on that Superglide over the winter. It'd definitely de-tech you for a while and give you something to keep your hands busy with.

Let's see...For books, I'll admit that I'm definitely not up on the latest and greatest. I've always liked Piers Anthony's Apprentice Adept series. It's got a great mix of fantasy, sci-fi, and humor. Good for a light read. I'd also have to go with eisenkreis on some good Clive Barker. Or rather, older Clive Barker. I think his new stuff has taken the same turn as Stephen King's new stuff, which is fairly crap. Go pick up the Books of Blood, which is a collection of great little short stories, Cabal, which was turned into the semi-cult movie Nightbreed, and Weaveworld. Good stuff.

nonethewiser From: nonethewiser Date: October 18th, 2005 08:38 am (UTC) (Link)
Neil Gaiman? I think you'd like American Gods.
moryssa From: moryssa Date: October 18th, 2005 10:46 am (UTC) (Link)
I *thoroughly* enjoyed "American Gods".

"Neverwhere", "Stardust", and "Smoke and Mirrors" were easier, quicker reads... but I really liked "American Gods" as much as, if not more than, the others. Unfortunately, I've heard that "Anansi Boys" isn't as good. I picked it up at Borders last week, but I haven't started it yet, as I'm making my way though Robert Jordan's Wheel of Time series again.
wolfbrotherjoe From: wolfbrotherjoe Date: October 18th, 2005 05:36 pm (UTC) (Link)
I already mentioned it on AIM, but I figured I'd remind you here, too, cause I have no idea how forgetful you are on the matter of books to be read. I know I can forget, often enough.

The Warrior's Apprentice, by Lois McMaster Bujold.
enveri From: enveri Date: October 18th, 2005 07:36 pm (UTC) (Link)
If anyone persues you with drama, send 'em to me. I'll take care of the problem. You've needed to get some 'me time' for a long time now, and I really really hope you'll take it.

As for books.... you know you're welcome to borrow any of ours. I like Dan Brown's stuff (in spite of the hype, it's actually rather intriguing) and Robert Ludlum's always fun for making things go boom. If you want something on the lighter side, you're welcome to sample my Dick Francis collection.

We love you, inkblot. If we can help, you know the number.
hightensile From: hightensile Date: October 19th, 2005 01:39 am (UTC) (Link)
You and I do not see eye-to-eye when it comes to tastes. Discuss.

11 thoughts or Leave a thought