Boy, was I ever wrong; I come in this morning to find this email:
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From: HELP DESK
To: Olsen, Jason
Subject: Ticket #26301
Jason,
Ticket #26301 has been re-opened. User states problem remains.
Thanks,
Help Desk.
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Okay, so I think the user has revised the ticket to tell me what the hell it is they're blithering about. I go into the Help Desk application and call up that ticket number, and give it a quick re-read Nope, the problem is still exactly the same, Rolando still wants to know if that server is accessable from the outside. But the reopening e-mail tells me quite clearly the problem remains.
Now I'm annoyed. The problem remains?
What goddamn fucking problem?
So, I decided I'm not going to waste my time calling this user for clarification (if he couldn't even work a simple web form to open a ticket properly, I seriously doubted he'll be able to articulate the true nature of his issue to me over the phone. I found out two minuntes ago that one of my coworkers had spoken to this guy, and his opinion was that you'd get better conversation from a Chia Pet). Since I'm not going to waste time and further frustrate myself, I do the standard Corporate America maneuver: I fire this back to the help desk and shove it off on them:
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From: Olsen, Jason
To: Help Desk
Subject: RE: Ticket #26301
They haven't described in the ticket what the problem is. "Rolando would like to know if 209.208.244.101 can be accessed from the outside." is not a problem description, it's a question. I answered that question when I closed the ticket with the resolution that "yes, I can ping it from the Internet," therefore it is accessable from the outside.
As far as I am concerned this isn't a trouble ticket until he can open it with a description of an actual problem, such as "Users are reporting problems accessing the server 209.208.244.101 via telnet."
-Jason
----Oringal Message----
From: HELP DESK
To: Olsen, Jason
Sent: Thursday, September 20, 2001 08:07
Subject: #26301
Jason,
Ticket #23601 has been re-opened. User states problem remains.
Thanks,
Help Desk
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I never knew that our staff was primarily Special Olympics runners we hired off the street for two bags of french fries and a glitter sticker.