... "irradiated haggis?" you may be asking yourself. No, no... that's the current count of unacknowledged messages in my network management console. Even though only 3,400 or so of them are showing up in the message browser, my Oracle client has given me a much larger, angrier figure that has the horrible ring of truth to it. These twenty-some-odd-thousand messages would go a long way towards explaining why the message browser has gotten despite our efforts to keep displayed messages to a minimum right now.
To address this problem I have hacked together a script to identify any message over 5 days old and acknowledge it, which should have the benefit of sending it off to the history table (if all goes according to plan). Tomorrow morning my automated database maintenance script will then take the history table and dump its contents to disk, resulting in a shiny, clean database uncluttered with thousands of messages that we didn't even know existed.
The problem is that the script -- using HP's DB-friendly message management tool -- is acknowledging a whopping one message per second, give or take a half second.